Take These Sunken Eyes
by Sound Of Silence
Summary: PLEASE R&R! She isn't running from her past, she's just chosen to forget it. When it begins to stare her straight in the face will anyone help this proud newsgirl take her sunken eyes and learn to see? All her life she's waited for a moment to be free.
1. Default Chapter

"Heya, Strykah!" Mush called to her waving, just before he picked up his girlfriend Hades and threw her off the dock into the cool water. Mush, Hades, and the rest of the Manhattan newsies had come down to Brooklyn to cool off. The day had been a scorcher, and in the summer they'd often come swimming after selling their papers.  
  
Stryker sat on the dock, dangling her feet in the water, watching her friends splash around. Her long sun-streaked blonde hair streaming out behind her in the evening breeze. She didn't like to swim. None of the newsies knew why, but they knew better than to try and find out.  
  
The others thought Stryker was brave. She never turned down a dare, and was usually willing to try anything. She appeared to be in control and confident. They had no idea of the horrors that haunted her dreams. There were three things that Stryker would never do, no matter how much her friends begged. She wouldn't swim, she wouldn't touch guns, and she wouldn't drink. Stryker was an expert with a slingshot, and she could fight just as hard as any of the boys, but those three things were forbidden in her mind.  
  
"Hey kid," Spot Conlon, leader of the Brooklyn newsies and boyfriend to her best friend Stripes, walked up behind her, "mind if I join ya?" He sat down next to her, splashing his dirty feet around.  
  
"Do I really got a choice?" Stryker joked, and turned to look at her friend.  
  
"Eh...nah. Nobody says no to Spot Conlon." They laughed. Spot and Stryker both had green eyes. His were dark and glittery. They often revealed of his mood. They shone when he was happy, and glared when he was mad. Hers were a very pale green. They were big, but expressionless. Stryker was also an expert at hiding her emotions.  
  
"Why ain't you'se swimmin'?" Stryker asked, noticing Stripes and their friends Chesapeake, and Revolution laughing and playing in the water.  
  
"I jist don't feel much like swimmin' today...Stripes understands." Spot shrugged, looking up at the sky and the setting sun.  
  
"Yeah...me neiddah." Stryker stood and brushed herself off. I'm gonna head back to da lodgin' house, Spot...I'm kinda worn out."  
  
"You feelin' okay?" Spot stood and looked her over, concern showing in his eyes.  
  
"Yeah...yeah, I'se fine. Jist tired. This heat really gits ta me sometimes."  
  
"I guess. Strykah? Tell somebody if you'se don't feel right." He put a hand on her shoulder and looked into her eyes.  
  
"I will. I'm fine...I sweah." She lied, nodding her head.  
  
(INSERT ITALICS) After she got back to the lodging house, Stryker laid on her bunk, looking at the ceiling. She'd lied to Spot when she said she was fine. She also knew the heat had nothing to do with her mood. It was exactly four years to the day since she first came to Manhattan. And she couldn't sleep. If she slept, she would dream. And on this night, her only dreams would be nightmares. So she stared at the bare ceiling...trying desperatly to think of anything but that day.  
  
The crashing and swearing Stryker heard were sure signs that her father was home. The skinny twelve year old girl sank down in bed, pretending to be asleep, praying with all her might that he wouldn't come looking for her.  
  
"Anne! Git up...where's da money?!" He came barreling into the tiny bedroom, throwing things everywhere and yelling.  
  
Stryker got out of bed, and leaned against the wall, wincing as her father overturned the bureau, and sent the old pitcher crashing into a thousand peices on the hard floor.  
  
She cowered against the wall as he came toward her, and slapped her across the face.  
  
"Where's da money?! I know you got it somewhere, dammit!" The money he wanted was all she had to pay next month's rent. She knew if she gave it to her father he would just go out to a brothel or a bar and get them evicted, just like last time.  
  
"Wh-what money Papa?" Stryker asked, her voice shaking as she spoke.  
  
"Don't play dumb wit me, little giol!" He pulled out a knife. "No! No...please!" Stryker cried upon seeing the knife, and threw herself at him, trying to wrestle the knife out of his hand, but she was small, no match for the big man. The knife slashed her across the face, and she gasped as she felt the hot blood running down her cheek.  
  
"Der! Dat'll teach ya, ya doity rodden whore!" Her father stood up, leaving Stryker breathing heavily on the floor, and began staggering for the door.  
  
When he reached door, Stryker flew to the side table and grabbed the pistol she'd been hiding. Her father gasped in horror as he realized it was the pistol he'd placed there just months before.  
  
"No....please...I..." He raised his hands, and she could see the sweat dripping down his face.  
  
The little girl clenched her eyes shut pointed, and squeezed the trigger. (END ITALICS)  
  
Stryker sat bolt upright in bed, gasping for breath. She shook her head, in a vain attempt to rid the nightmare from her mind. Looking around, she thanked God that she hadn't woken any of the girls from screaming. She lay back down to make a consious effort to get some real rest, soflty rubbing the faint scar that ran along her left jawline.  
  
(INSERT ITALICS) Stryker heard him fall to the ground. After what seemed like hours, she finally opened her eyes. Realizing what she had done, terror seized her. She threw on some clothes and ran out the door.  
  
She ran out of the building and into the streets. She ran far from Harlam...and she kept running. Never looking back. Until she collapsed from exhaustion on a bench in central park. (END ITALICS) 


	2. Chapter 2

"Strykah....C'mon Stryk, you have ta git up!" She could feel someone shaking her. "Whatsa mattah whicha? You'se been moanin' in ya sleep. Didja have a bad dream?" She could hear the familiar sounds of the newsgirls rushing to get out the door.  
  
"Leave her alone, Chesapeake." Stripes swatted Chesa's arm away from Stryker.  
  
"It's ok...I'm up." She muttered into her pillow. By the time Stryker dragged herself out of bed, all the girls except Chesapeake, Hades, Revolution, and her best friend Stripes had left for the day.  
  
"Go ahead Chesa, Hades, Rev...We'se comin'." Chesapeake nodded at Stripes, and flipped her long wavy black hair over her shoulder. Hades and Revolution turned, and followed Chesapeake out of the room.  
  
"Ok...see ya out there." Stripes waited until she was sure they were alone in the lodging house.  
  
"Strykah...did ya have a nightmare?" She asked her best friend, her questioning aqua eyes showed her concern.  
  
"Yeah." Stryker whispered, stopping mid-button from buttoning her shirt.  
  
"I heard ya moanin'...but I don't think many of the others did." She put her arms around her friend, and brushed the long blonde hair out of Stryker's face.  
  
"Dontcha gotta meet Spot dis mornin'?" Stryker asked, abruptly changing the subject.  
  
"Yeah...he's comin' up from Brooklyn today...you don't want me ta stay?" Stripes asked,running a hand through her shoulder length blonde hair.  
  
"Nah...I'll be okay...go meet yer boyfriend." Stryker nodded toward the door, and watched Stripes leave. She finished dressing, grabbed her newsie cap and headed for the distribution center.  
  
"Heya Strykah!" Kid Blink greeted her as she came up the steps.  
  
"How's rollin' kid?" Itey asked, his arm around his girlfriend, Revolution.  
  
"Heya boys" She answered.  
  
"Say...you don't look so good, Strykah." Jack remarked, noticing the dark circles under her eyes. "Didja have a bad dream or somethin'?" He asked laughing.  
  
"Shuddup Cowboy...'for I soak ya." Stryker replied, smirking. She wasn't about to admit the she still had nightmares about her past. "Hows da headline taday, Cowboy?" She asked, nodding at his stack of papers.  
  
"Eh...it don't mattah. I'se da best newsie in dis hear city. I can sell 'em no mattah da headline." Jack swung his papers over his shoulder and headed uptown.  
  
"Dat boy's got too much confidence fer his own good." Blink remarked and Jack swaggered off. The crowd of newsies grew smaller until just Stryker, Spot and Stripes were left in line. Stryker was getting her papers and hassling Weasel like usual.  
  
"Spot...you go on without me okay?" Stripes asked quietly, putting a hand on his arm. "I'll catch up wit ya. I wanna talk to Strykah bout somethin' real quick."  
  
"Yeah...I'se think you bettah." Spot glanced at Stryker, a concerned look flashing across his face. "Jacky Boy was right. She don't look good."  
  
"I know...she hasn't felt well since last night. I jist wanna make sure she'll be okay selling on her own." Stripes lied, avoiding Spot's eyes. She knew that Stryker was physically fine. But the events of the night before hadn't been easy on her friend. She was good at covering up her emotions, but Stripes could tell that she was truly shaken, and it made her nervous.  
  
"Awright...your turn, kids." Stryker, papers in hand announced, as she started down the steps.  
  
"Strykah...wait!" Stripes called. "Wait a sec...I wanna talk to ya." She blew Spot a kiss before heading down.  
  
"Are you sure you'll be ok?" Stripes asked, placing a hand on her shoulder. "You can sell wit me an Spot if ya want."  
  
Stryker rolled her eyes and sighed. "And watch da two o you make eyes at eachoddah all day?" She laughed "I think I'll pass."  
  
"Ok...if your sure..."  
  
"Stripes." Stryker looked her friend straight in the eyes. "I sweah to ya on me mudda's grave dat I ain't lying to ya. It was jist a bad dream. I'll be ok."  
  
Stripes was relieved. Stryker was also an expert when it came to decieving people, but she would never swear over her mother if she was lying. "Ok...if you'se sure. Hey...we'se all meetin' at Tibby's later ta divvy up. Why doncha come?"  
  
"Hey...for you? Anyting." Stryker smile a genuinly at her closest friend. "And Stripes?"  
  
"Yeah?"  
  
"Don't tell Spot nuttin' about lat night. K?"  
  
"I won't." Stripes knew Stryker didn't like to talk about her past. Like a lot of the newsies, she chose to keep her more unpleasent exprieinces to herself. But Stripes could read her friend well, and she knew there was more than a little something bothering her. Stripes would never betray her best friend's trust. But it was getting harder for her to make excuses and lie to her boyfriend when he asked about Stryker. 


	3. Chapter 3

Stryker made her way through the streets of the city selling her papers. By late afternoon she had sold out, and headed to Tibby's to get something to eat.  
  
The bell over the door jingled as she pushed it open. She saw a bunch of the Manhatten newsies, and Spot of course, already there. She saw an empty seat at a table where Jack, Chesapeake, Race, Spot, Stripes, Mush, and Hades were sitting and made her way toward them.  
  
"Heya Strykah." Stripes called out to her friend as she took her seat.  
  
"Howdja sell today, Stryk?" Jack asked, lighting up a cigarette.  
  
"Sold em' all. After all, it ain't da healine it's da newsie, right?" Stryker asked jokingly.  
  
She ordered some food and had a good time chatting with the newsies.  
  
"Well boys...whaddya say we's all head to Brooklyn and go fer a swim?" Spot asked, leaning back in his chair, an arm around Stripes.  
  
After a chorus of yes and alrights, the gang headed for the docks.  
  
Stryker rolled up her pant legs, and splashed her feet around in the water. The late afternoon sun was hot and she soon began to sweat from sitting in the heat. As she began unbuttoning her shirt cat calls errupted from all over the docks.  
  
"Whoo-hoo! Take it off Strykah!" Blink cried just before Chesapeake and Revolution jumped on his back, dunking him underwater.  
  
"Strykah! C'mon! What are ya stopping for?" Jack cried.  
  
"Settle down boys...I'se got me undahshirt on." She slipped out of the plaid flannel and instantly felt better as the breeze hit her bare skin. Leaning back, she closed her eyes and brethed in deeply. Her dreamlike state kept her from hearing the whispers and footsteps behind her until it was too late.  
  
"Agh!" She cried as a bucket of chilly ocean water was dumped over her head. "What da hell!" She screeched, jumping up in time to see Jack running down the docks. Looking down, she noticed that the water had soaked her undershirt, leaving little to the imagination. "I'll soak ya, Cowboy!" She let out a screech and took off after him, her long hair flying out behind her. She could easily run faster and it wasn't long before she had caught up to the culprit. She balled her hand into a fist that quickly connected with Jack's eye.  
  
"Ahhh...easy goil!" Jack yelled as the impact from the blow caused him to stumble backwards. He put a hand over his eye, looking at her through his good eye, it widend when he saw that in her fury she had left her flannel shirt behind.  
  
Stryker noticed his glance, and quickly covering her chest with her arms she turned her head away. "You ain't got no decency, do ya Cowboy?"  
  
He came toward her, holding out a hand. "Please...Strykah I'm sorry..." She smacked his hand away and faced the wall.  
  
"Git away from me ya doity rodden fink!"  
  
"Jist lemme....here." He slipped out of his own wet undershirt and let fall over her head. Stryker tugged it on, covering up what she could. "I'll walk ya back to da docks" He said, placing a protective arm over her shoulder" She bristled at his touch, but softened once she realized that he was trying to help. As they slowly made their way back she began to giggle.  
  
"Whatcha laughin' bout?" Jack asked, still squinting his already bruising eye.  
  
"Jist...." She couldn't control it anymore and her whole body shook with laughter. "Da look on ya face when I threw ya one!"  
  
Jack smiled. "I wish ya woulda seen dis humor before." He said, rubbing his eye.  
  
As they made their way back to the docks, they got some commentary from the newsies who were drying off.  
  
"Ooh...Strykah you and Cowboy gettin' friendly?" Hades asked, nudging Mush in their direction.  
  
"Is love in da air?" Chesapeake put a hand to her heart and sighed deeply.  
  
Stripes just raised her eyebrows and tossed Stryker her shirt. "Heah...I thought you might be needin' dis." She gave her friend an intense look meaning, We'll talk later.  
  
Stryker caught the shirt with one hand and had it on and buttoned before anymore comments concerning the size of her chest could be uttered.  
  
"C'mon goilies...let's head back." Chesapeake said, wringing out a fistful of her thick black hair.  
  
She and Stryker stood chatting with the boys while Stripes cuddled with spot, saying her goodnights.  
  
"Ahem." Stryker cleared her throat. "Ok...that'll do. You'll see eachother soon enough." She grabbed Stripes by the back of the shirt and pulled her away from Spot.  
  
"Hey..." Stripes turned and blew Spot on final kiss before Stryker began dragging her down the street.  
  
Once they reached the boys lodging house everyone stopped to say goodnight.  
  
"Heya Stryk...I'se truly sorry bout before." Jack came up behind her and whispered in her ear. "Wll ya forgive me?" He smiled at her innocently.  
  
Stryker rolled her eyes and pushed his face away. "All's forgiven Cowboy." She smiled back and held a finger up. "But not forgotten....C'mon Chesa, Stripes, let's go!"  
  
"Wait...what about Hades and Rev?" Chesapeake asked, pointing a finger towards two figures embracing in the shadows.  
  
"Oi vey!" Stryker groaned. "She'll catch up...Mush and Itey'll walk 'em back. I ain't waitin'."  
  
The girls continued on to their lodging house. Stryker began the climb up to her bunk when A hand grabbed her suspenders and pulled her back down.  
  
"Don't think you'se getting off so easily, Strykah." Stripes quietly shook a finger in Stryker's face.  
  
"What?" Stryker asked, innocently, her eyes widening. "I'm jist goin' to bed like always."  
  
"Not without givin' me the full scoop first. Now sit." Stripes demmanded, pushing Stryker onto her bunk.  
  
"What happened between you and Cowboy tonight? You two looked pretty cozy when ya walked up all huddled together." Stripes whispered, so as not to disturb the girls who were already in bed.  
  
"Please Stripes. I've known da boy for years." Stryker said simply. "He was keepin' me covered, dats all. My undahshirt don't exactly keep it all hidden when it's soaked da whole a t'rough, ya know." She answered, brushing a strand of hair out of her eyes.  
  
"You lyin' ta me?" Stripes asked, looking directly into the big pale green eyes, trying to uncover the truth. "I mean, he gave ya da shirt off his own back."  
  
"Nope. It was nuttin'. Now leave me alone I'm tired." And with that, she climbed up to her bunk and left Stripes to wonder in the darkness below her.  
  
Stryker didn't have any dreams for a few weeks. As the years after her arrival in Manhatten passed, they grew few and far between. The dream of her father's death was always the worst. It was so vivid and real. The dream of her brother's death was beginning to fade...something that Stryker was more happy than sad about. She never had dreams about her mother's death, but the memories she'd held close to her were also growing dim. 


End file.
